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For The Love With Jen Hatmaker Podcast

Aug 30, 2023

As we close in on the end of our Community and Friendships series, we’re reflecting on the great conversations we’ve had toward building relationships in our lives. And this week’s convo puts the cherry on top as we discuss our friends as “chosen family” and the shape that our friendship and communities take when we are in a place where we need extra support. Our guest this week, Emma Nadler, is a therapist, author and speaker who is doing valuable work in helping people build deeper relationships. Emma knows firsthand what it means to rely on her circle in ways she never thought she would, when her daughter was diagnosed with a DNA disorder, shifting the life she knew, and navigating the special care, multiple hospital stays, and more than full-time parenting her daughter needs. By leaning on her community and being brave enough to ask for help (when sometimes the tendency is to act like we’ve got it all under control). Emma’s goal is to show us how we can look beyond preconceived notions about what it means to be valued and to belong, and leads us toward building a world where thriving in community is possible for every single person. 

Emma and Jen touch on: 

  • What it looks like when our “family” looks different than expected in the context of friendships and our communities

  • How to understand and learn to tolerate our emotions when it comes to interacting with friends and community and how to find meaning in everything—good and bad

  • Practical steps on fostering really authentic connections, asking for help, and creating inclusive spaces

  • The power of being direct when reaching out to connect with new people, or friends you’ve drifted from, to foster a deeper relationship 

There’s so much value in learning how to meaningfully connect with others and create communities and friendships that celebrate our joyful times and anchor us at difficult times.

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Thought-Provoking Quotes:

“We're born into something and we get certain things from that family; we might get a lot of things. We might get a lot of love. Some people do, some people don't get what they need. I think we can take that and build on it in the relationships that we create in our lives.” - Emma Nadler

“There are 53 million caregivers in the United States right now and we can really feel alone, even though we're not. Often our work [leaves us] tucked away. We're at home. We have so much that we're grappling with that isn't seen. And so it can really feel [lonely].” - Emma Nadler

“What would it be like to be open with people about what we are looking for in our relationships, what we want, and really let that in? ” - Emma Nadler

“To me, in relationships, the question I'm most interested in is, do we want the same things out of this relationship?” - Emma Nadler

“We're full of possibilities. We just never know when we're gonna meet someone who will change our life.” - Emma Nadler


Resources Mentioned in This Episode:

The Unlikely Village of Eden by Emma Nadler
Feed These People by Jen Hatmaker

Dr. Robert Waldinger’s Harvard Second Generation Study


Guest’s Links:

Emma’s Website

Emma’s Instagram

Emma’s Facebook


Connect with Jen!
Jen’s website

Jen’s Instagram

Jen’s Twitter

Jen’s Facebook

Jen’s YouTube


PLEASE NOTE: Listening to this podcast in no way creates a client/therapist relationship with Emma Nadler. This is educational in nature. No legal, counseling, or other professional services are being rendered and nothing is intended to provide such services or advice of any kind. If you are having a mental health emergency, please contact 911 or go to your nearest emergency room. You can also text or call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline (within the United States).